Chapter 6 Life Skills and Attributes Part 2
Are you feeling Friday?
I am where I need to be, my office today is the beach. My desk ; the sand. My music ; the waves. The sun warms my heart…..I can create.
So what other life skills will you need.........
The ability to “cope” with challenges, seeing them as an opportunities to learn and grow, rather than get knocked back by them, to be able to deal positively with difficulties, and be able continue on your original path, so that no matter how many challenges and problems are thrown your way, you can still come through smelling the coffee!!!
This can be an inherent natural skill or it can be learnt. It is an attitude or state of mind. You can make a choice to be resilient.
Watch out for the state of mind, either in yourself, or in other people, that allows difficulties to affect in a negative way, blaming the situation on those difficulties, and not looking for a positive solution or outcome. This is a very destructive state of mind and will prevent the achievement of your goals and dreams.
Resilience at it’s strongest and most powerful, is the ability to keep trying for the best outcome, no matter what the circumstances.
The importance of resilience will become much more apparent, being illustrated time and again in the next book “Salmon Surfing Rocks” which will deal with difficulties and life events that may occur, but showing that with resilience, patience and perseverance, great outcomes can be achieved.
This for me has been one of the hardest skills to learn. With this fast paced, frenetically moving world, we expect things to happen as soon as we want them.
We are told that customer service has to be fast, internet is fast and almost immediate. We have “Fast Food”, fast cars, boats and motorbikes. Speedy delivery of goods and services……..it’s all part of the “Human Race” but do we really want to get to the finish line first?!!!
Salmon Surfing Downstream is about the journey of getting to your pool of calm and living your freestyle lifestyle. It does not happen straight way, for me it has taken a journey of 15 years…..but it has been a highly rewarding journey with the end result being more than I had imagined. I have faced more difficulties and challenges than I thought it was possible to have, but each time I have come out stronger. I have faced my worst fears to a point now where I am not fearful anymore. What will be will be. I am resilient enough to come through, NO MATTER WHAT. And what does that mean? Mentally I have real peace of mind. Physically I am comfortable about who I am, yes, I would love to be “ yogatastic” and youthful, but I accept my imperfections and at times love them; aging has no fear for me, it just proves my life experience and actually I rather enjoy it! I am healthier today than I was15 years ago, and I actually feel younger!!!
I have learnt the BIG lesson of life; that things happen when they are meant to.
So if you find yourself effectively “banging your head against a brick wall” wanting a result that is just not happening immediately, take a breath, back right off, and go and do something else instead. I bet you nine times out of ten, something will happen that is actually a better outcome and more timely than the original outcome you were trying to achieve.
Yes, important. But this is a difficult one. If you truly have a “gut feeling” that what you are trying to achieve is absolutely the right thing, then perseverance is very important. However, if your path seems to be repeatedly blocked, it may be appropriate to change direction, and find an alternative solution. It doesn’t mean you are not persevering, it just means you are changing tack, and persevering in a different way to the same goal. Persevering too hard in some circumstances can lead to unwanted stress, which, in turn, can directly block the desired outcome. So patience and gentle perseverance are more appropriate.
This was another difficult one for me……..except when it involved the timely completion of goals, remembering birthdays and sending Christmas cards BEFORE Christmas. I consistently failed at all of these! Therefore, I was at least, consistent!!
Being consistent is a habit, and infers reliability. Writing this book was challenging for me, as I had to be consistent in getting the chapters ready for publication each Friday. In general, I have been consistent, only missing one deadline, because I didn’t get the publishing sequence correct. The chapter was written and ready well before the deadline, however, the result was, that it was published late, after I had rectified my errors.
A while ago I wrote this
Accept what is,
Embrace the now,
Tomorrow is different,
It’s up to you, how.
To be able to accept your present situation and embrace it, is a gift worth aspiring to. We often hear “ live in the present” be “mindful”.
If you practice this, you will enjoy your journey much more, being able to appreciate all the changes and progress that you are making. If your mind is elsewhere, in the future (not reality) or the past ( gone and not relevant to your now) you will miss the joys of the moment around you. Have you gone out for a meal and been absorbed by your phone, eaten your meal, and not even really noticed what you have eaten? Or held back from making a decision because of a past event? Or been trying to plan for the next 6 months and missed out on today?
Without acceptance of the “now” your journey will feel more challenging and arduous, (and why would you want to feel that way?)
Practice noticing the small things around you that you are grateful for. It might take 5 minutes during your morning coffee (Hmmm, the smell) for you to sit and think of 10 things . It will surprise you what comes up. Each day of the week, try and think of 10 different things. Trust me, it will lift your mood.
Your reality only belongs to you. Nobody else has the same reality as you, they have their own and different reality. This is an important concept to understand. You will see, hear, and value things differently from anybody-else. Your reality is as unique as you are, as is your journey. You will have supporters and dissenters. Cheer with your supporters. Your dissenters will continue to live in their own reality ( and let’s hope they are happy with it?) They have no place in your life journey
Reality always has to be in balance. There will always be positive and negative. The dream you achieve, may turn out to be different from the one you expected. Sometimes there is a darker side which you didn't expect. This is, in my opinion is just universal balance and has to be accepted. Ying and Yang.
This is the penultimate chapter of the book, “Salmon Surfing Downstream.”
“Salmon Surfing Downstream” is very much a practical “ how to start” book which has addressed the mentality, tools , and life skills you will need to start surfing downstream, in order for you to achieve your dream goal of living a Freestyle Lifestyle. A true “freelifestyler”.
It is the first book of a trilogy.
Soon to follow is “Salmon Surfing Rocks” a book which positively addresses the physicality and difficulties that you may encounter in your journey.
All experiences have been great learning, and growth opportunities., My stories and may help guide you to better outcomes.
The final book is “ Paint your butterfly” and will appeal to the more spiritual among us. There has been a powerfully growing spiritual side to my personal journey.
This Book will relate many true stories of beautifully magical events that have occurred, which have shaped and redefined my own belief system . All I can say is that I am where I need to be and it’s way better than I dreamed it would be, although different.